By dawns early light

Now of course since my little one is sleeping more at night, I am getting insomnia. It actually kind of works well, I can at least get some of the quieter chores done while baby and daddy sleep (although I got quite the confused look this am when my hubby found me up and doing laundry)... back to horses...

Indy  has no problem with the early mornings as long as
 there's no screaming baby involved

Last week- Usually I hack on Mondays with Karley, but since she was sick , I brought my boys and rode pretty much alone in the indoor. It was really nice light workout (which if I had known lesson was canceled Tues I would have done a bit more). Louie listens well undistracted and I worked on not falling apart at transitions. I find I am floppy and stiff at the same time, simply a byproduct of still recovering muscle tone and nerves (whether I admit it to myself or not). I think (hope) as my muscle tone rebuilds I will start to trust myself more and relax (I'm sure much to Louie's delight).

Handsome, albeit fuzzy Louie

Then lesson night was moved to Thursday, which is a hard day for me to make since I work the night shift before and after, making a 6pm lesson push right up against important things like eating before work. It was a cold but clear night so we rode outside. I had been feeling off but got super dizzy while riding, so I was shamefully relieved to feel like I had a valid excuse to not jump. I give so much credit to the ladies I ride with, not everyone will just chin up and jump in late dusk lighting by the light of golf cart headlights with horses cutting out in nearby pastures. I also got the "next time you jump, no more excuses" from my trainer. I knew it was coming, I needed her to demand it.

This week I was super sick from that Thursday night (at work fun, fun) until well, I still feel crappy, but better. I decided not to ride Monday so just had lesson last night. We dragged the jumps up into the indoor and our trainer set up a little jump, but with ground poles  and wings of sorts etc, making me feel like the horses were going to hopscotch up to the jump. The funny thing is, I'm not scared of the jump, its the landing/ lead change after that get me.  I FINALLY put my big girl panties on and timidly made my way into the line up. After Karley and Henry cautiously made their way to and over the jump Louie and I took our turn. I must say he was a bit confused  and I was tense so he let out quite the leap at the end, rocketing me up and off balance. I was all over the place, too far in front of the vertical beforehand, leaving me lurched forward after. I got better after a few jumps (being denied water or stopping until I was told) I was finally able to relax a tiny bit allowing me to sit back. I have some not so spectacular video I will post soon. Louie looks so beautiful, I forget just how great he looks from the ground.

I feel in no way cured, or back to even the very novice level I was before baby, but at least I know I can get bopped all over the place, and I stay up there. (Not saying I can't or might not fall, but that I at least have better control than I thought). I wish others rode tonight, but since they don't will try to get  a fast hack in on Thursday. ... baby steps... baby steps...